Ladies, let’s talk about something we’ve all experienced: men who say one thing and then do another. It’s frustrating, right? You meet someone, and in the beginning, they seem genuine and say all the right things, but as time goes on, their actions don’t match their words. They start to flake, cancel plans, or just disappear altogether.

Here’s the thing: when a man flakes out or doesn’t follow through, I want you to recognize that as a blessing, not a curse.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Rejection is protection”? It’s so true. When something isn’t meant for you, it’s better to realize it sooner rather than later. The key is to recognize this sooner, ideally before you’ve invested too much time or emotion.

The sooner you spot that he doesn’t mean what he says, the better off you’ll be. That’s less time for your heart to get attached, and more time for you to focus on finding someone who truly aligns with your needs. But here’s the catch—you have to believe that what is right for you is out there. And the clearer you get about who you want and who you don’t want, the quicker you’ll recognize him.

When I say “who you want,” I’m not talking about superficial qualities like height, income, or what kind of car he drives. Sure, it’s easy to get caught up in those things, but let’s be real—muscles and money aren’t going to listen to you when you have emotional needs. Empathy will.

So, is he empathetic? Does he listen? Does he care about your feelings and needs? These are the qualities that matter in a partner.

Now, here’s my advice if you’re actively dating: after each date, take time to reflect. Whether it’s jotting down notes in a journal, recording a voice memo on your phone, or even getting creative with a whiteboard nailed to your wall—document how you felt before, during, and after the date.

Ask yourself these questions:

• How did I feel on the date?
• How did I feel before, during, and after the date?

By becoming hyper-aware of your feelings, you’ll start to see patterns and notice when something feels off. This will help you spot when someone isn’t right for you, and it’ll also help you identify when someone is right for you.

Remember, recognizing the wrong guy early on saves you time, emotional energy, and allows you to stay open for the right guy. So, don’t be discouraged when someone flakes—see it as a blessing in disguise and keep moving forward with clarity and confidence.

Join my Facebook group, “Secrets to Attracting a High-Quality Man,” where we dive deeper into recognizing red flags and finding partners who truly align with what you deserve. Let’s navigate this dating journey together!